Charts Showing Different Causes of Death in the USA for Two Different Years
My Writing
The pie charts display the proportion of six primary culprits of death in the USA, and this survey was conducted in 1975 and 2002.
Overall, heart disease and ‘other’ were the root causes of death throughout the survey, while lung disease showed the least.
To begin with, in 1975, a substantial proportion of 38% was seen in heart diseases, and that of ‘other’ was 4% less than heart diseases. This was followed by cancer, which was half that of ‘other’. Following that, accident, pneumonia, and lung disease illustrated a marginal difference, which ranged between 6% and 2% in order.
Turning to 2002, the category of ‘other’ showed an increasing trend, and it had a considerable percentage of 35%. A similar trend was illustrated in cancer, which had slightly less than a quarter at 23%. As for pneumonia and lung disease, they presented a proportional pattern to cancer, as the former had 4% while the latter was depicted at 3%. In terms of heart disease and accident, they presented an inversely proportional tendency shown as 31% and 4%, respectively. (178 words)
The report does a commendable job at providing a structured and concise analysis of the differences in causes of death for the two years. Here are some observations and suggestions:
Strengths:
- Clear Introduction: The introduction effectively sets the context by mentioning what the pie charts display and the years in which the surveys were conducted.
- Use of Comparative Language: The report uses comparative language like “a substantial proportion,” “half that of,” and “marginal difference” which aids in understanding the data more intuitively.
- Logical Structure: The data is structured logically, first discussing 1975 and then 2002, which makes it easy to follow.
Areas for Improvement:
- Specific Data Points: It might be helpful to have specific data points for all categories, especially for 1975 where there’s a mention of a “marginal difference” between accident, pneumonia, and lung disease, but exact percentages are given only for lung disease.
- Consistency in Descriptions: While the description for 1975 uses terms like “substantial proportion” and “half that of,” the 2002 description is more direct with percentages. It might be more effective to maintain a consistent style throughout.
- Clarification on Trends: The statement “Turning to 2002, the category of ‘other’ showed an increasing trend” implies a comparison with 1975, but the 1975 value for ‘other’ isn’t explicitly mentioned before this. So, readers might have to backtrack to understand the trend.
Minor Stylistic Points:
- The phrase “root causes of death” might be more accurately described as “leading causes of death.”
- Instead of “this survey was conducted,” it might be more direct to say “data is from 1975 and 2002.”
Overall, the report does a good job at providing an overview of the data from the charts. With a few refinements, it could be even more effective in conveying the information clearly and concisely.
The pie charts illustrate the distribution of six primary causes of death in the USA for the years 1975 and 2002.
Overall, heart disease and the ‘other’ category dominated as leading causes of mortality during these years, with lung disease accounting for the smallest portion.
In 1975, heart diseases took the lead, making up 38% of the deaths, closely followed by the ‘other’ category at 4% less. Cancer was the next significant cause, standing at half the percentage of the ‘other’ category. Deaths due to accidents, pneumonia, and lung disease were relatively close, with percentages spanning from 2% to 6%.
By 2002, there was a noticeable rise in the ‘other’ category, reaching 35%. Cancer also saw an uptick, accounting for 23% of the deaths. Pneumonia and lung disease mirrored each other in proportions, with 4% and 3% respectively. Heart disease, though still significant, reduced to 31%, whereas accidents remained consistent at 4%.